Thursday, March 29, 2012

You're so simple

Dear Cancer-

The medical community might think I'm nuts, but I think you're simple. Spending time with kids shows just how simple you are. When I was diagnosed, my best friend's little girl Teagan, was three. When Teagan asked Crystal why she was upset, Crystal told her I was sick. As you'd imagine, the innocent questioning began. "Why doesn't her mommy just hug her? Why doesn't she just take some medicine to feel better? Why doesn't she just take a nap?" Through the online world, Teagan saw me lose weight, hair, eye lashes and eyebrows. She saw the funny bump and scar from a Chemo port. She asked more questions.  She wanted to know what hurt on my body.  Crystal told her, I was sick in my boobies.  She said doctors, much like her daddy, would give me medicine, but it would make my hair fall out.  Through treatment I'd get phone calls from Miss Teagan saying, "Don't be sad. You should be happy," and "Don't worry, Dan Dan, the doctors will take the buggies out of your boobies." In the eyes of a child, you were just some bugs. So simple.

Last night, as Teagan was playing on the floor she looked at me out of nowhere and said, "Dan Dan, do you have new boobies?" I said, "Yes sweetheart, I do." She said, "The doctors took those buggies out, and you got new ones." I choose to look at you like a child; simple, insignificant and not worth worry. Life is simply to fragile. I might as well, sit on the floor and play dolls with Teagan.